Some Answers

Okay I'm posting this because Catharine is having a conniption (yes I used that word, I spent all day talking to a Jewish guy).

So I am officially single. Yes, bring on the dudes. (Charles don't think I don't remember that SN)

No seriously last night I basically told Andrew that I was guarding myself against him after saturday (we broke up for an hour on saturday). And not guarding like he was gonna hurt me, but from feeling emotions towards him. Last night I told him this, and also that I felt a need to see a particular other person who I talk to often but am never in a physical presense of. (ooooh mysterious) I didnt' mean that I needed to be "with" this guy or whatever I just want to see him, hang out with him, maybe use my mouth to talk to him instead of my fingers (now THAT sounds bad).

Well Andrew said that me thinking about this other guy so much wasn't good for our relationship and that if I really loved Andrew I wouldn't feel like I do towards said other guy. Which is probably true and probably why I'm doing better than expected with this break up. Even if I'm doing okay, I know he isn't, and he keeps trying to talk to me about things, whereas I just clamp up when I'm around him. I dont' really know why, maybe I figure if I dont' say anything at all he can't be hurt or mad, but I guess that's probably worse.

Anyway, long story short, he's moving into the den, we're both moving out eventually, but he's gonna try to be friends with me still. I am perfectly willing to still be friends with him, I just feel like he'd have a problem, but we'll see how it goes.

It was probably a perfect time to break up for me, because at this time in my monthly hell cycle I'm actually happy mostly all of the time. That probably sounds really selfish but it's also probably why I'm not crying all the time and actually trying to deal in a positive way.

I guess that's it for now, I'll keep everyone posted...or just Catharine :-P

Comments

Sophia said…
Its interesting to me that you won't allow yourself to feel emotions about this. Even if you initiate a breakup, there are still feelings. Think about how being emotionally disconnected has impaired you in past and present relationships. Intersting...
12:23 PM, February 01, 2006
Anonymous said…
I want to be kept posted too!

-Erin
11:43 PM, February 01, 2006
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