A Leg Grows in C Minor

So we're starting up a new study in approximately a week in which we'll probably enroll 45 people, if not more. We also have two cancer studies, two pain studies, and two insomnia studies running at this time. This means basically all of April is booked up already with runs. This means I will most likely be working overnight 5 nights a week for the next few months. I think few people know how really annoying it is to work that many overnights in a short period of time. It fucks me up bad and by the 5th night I can't think straight. Adding to this is the fact that Andrew has horrific amounts of school work these next few months so has no free time (apparently software engineering is a demanding field or something :-P) AND we need to find an apartment by June. Yes, we are moving in together. Yes, we are living in sin as Sue's parents say. At least by June we'll actually get to see each other on a regular basis. So....this sucks. But if I can get through at least April...

Okay I know I'm contradicting the last post I did because this post will be ridiculous, but I swear to god, my sense of smell is freaking me out. #1 I was at Mex on St. Patrick's Day and I was drinking a midouri sour, and I swear the lemon on the glass smelled like weed. I promptly told my coworkers who looked at me like I was crazy and probably all want to give me a drug test now. #2 The toilet paper in the public restroom down the hall from my lab smells like DOUGHNUTS. I'm not kidding I kept smelling it and it smelled so good and made me want doughnuts. Now this could be because I gave them up for Lent and I am smell-hallucinating....but seriously come and smell the toilet paper. And no, I am not pregnant.

I usually do my journal reading rounds while I'm at work overnight, and after that I write in mine (if I have anything to say). I read journals in a random order and when I read Tim's (or Joe's sometimes) last I always feel a need to be profound in my writing. My writing never seems good enough. I've always felt that I was not as profound as others, and I think in a way this has given me a complex. I know I'm smart, very smart even, and I am a good writer and student when I need to be, but I could never dig deep, really deep. Sometimes I think it's because I just don't care, and sometimes I think it's too hard for me to think in those terms. I'm not sure if I'm making any sense, but take poetry, for instance. My exes Nate and Angelo both wrote poetry. They were both geniuses in their own right and I respected that. But while they would write poems for me, I never really cared for them as much as I should have. I like the literal. I'm a great ...

So let me tell you all a little story. This may or may not have happened to you before, since many variations of it have happened to me. So I am in the shower this morning, I've just finished lathering up my hair when I turn and see a little spider on the shower curtain. Now, as I've done so many times before, I freeze. I watch it for about 5 minutes until I feel the water in the bottom of the shower creep up around my ankles (our tub hoards water at the bottom). I think, okay either do something and stop watching the damn spider, or be in the shower until the hot water has run out and the tub is overflowing. So I cease our western-duel-type standoff to rinse off my hair. Every few minutes I open my eyes and look back to make sure the spider hasn't somehow tricked me into closing my eyes so it can attack. When I'm satisfied that the spider is at the exact same spot it was a moment before, I resume the hair rinsing. Now at this point you may be thinking "why doesn...

I'm sitting in the livingroom of my apartment watching the Jeff Foxworthy Roast, for the sole reason of Lisa Lampinelli being on it. I saw her (met her/talked to her) twice and now she's on this roast and it's really cool for me to see her talking to famous people when a few months ago I was telling her that she's amazing. Now at the same time on tv is "Taxicab Hot!" which is the hottest compilations of Taxicab Confessions. Now for some *strange* reason I'm feeling overly randy today so I'm flipping between both channels. Anyway, pointless story over. I only have one overnight this week, which is tomorrow night. So I may be doing another posting at that time. Then at the end of the week it's home for the weekend for Easter then the week after ANGIE IS COMING HERE. Wooohoooo. I haven't seen her since September so I'm excited. Oh and my birthday is coming up soon so mi mama is taking me to buy a digital camera next weekend. Now all I...

I'm sick. I got sick from...my boyfriend. I made him sick a few times before, so I guess it was my turn to get sick. It's annoying because I have so much to do at work right now and I just want to sleeeeep (which is what I'm gonna do in a few minutes). Oh well I'm still going out on the town tomorrow night. So I've been wrestling with this issue of how many vacations to take this summer (seriously). I have an APSS (sleep research) conference in Denver in late June, and while I'm there I'm drinking and having fun and STILL getting paid so it'd be nice to go. Vacation number 2 is when Joe invited me to go to Las Vegas (also in late June) along with his family and Sue. Las Vegas would be REALLY fun and I'd love to go. Then there's San Jose which is where Andrew is from. His sister is getting married in August and I've been invited to the wedding, which means meeting his family and which means GOING TO CALIFORNIA which I've wanted t...

Okay I am stuck in the lab for a few minutes before I leave because some maintenance guy just came to do trash and stuff, but I was surfing through threads on the IMDB forum and one of them just got me SO FUCKING PISSED. I was looking at the hit movies that are out now and I went to Hitch and one of the threads caught my eye. It was about homophobia in Hollywood and why there wasn't a male/male couple shown in the film. Now granted, I don't care that there was no male/male or female/female stuff in the movie but what I DO care about is homosexuality in general. There were some posters on the forum that were just saying things like "Go find an island and move all your people there, that way you can reproduce and we won't have to deal with you" and similar stuff. WTF???!!! PEOPLE ARE SO FUCKING FRUSTRATING to me with this topic. **GRRRR** Who the hell cares if people are gay. Gay people are still people and they can love whomever they want. If they're ...

Well I'm supposed to be scoring a record right now. However....Arick is still scoring his record aka I have no way of doing mine until he's done because there aren't enough Stellate Keys to go around. Now that everyone is sufficiently confused....I am not scoring a record and therefore am searching the web for interesting things to do/read. Well I went back....waaaay back to the first time I ever posted in a blog, not this blog, but my old dead blog with Joe. This was in 2001 and these posts are still funny to me: ... "Evil Rich Insipid Cow Ass" E.R.I.C.A :: Joe's current thought as of 4:17 PM [+] :: "Jerks Off Emus" J.O.E See how YOU like it :: Erica ! 4:24 PM [+] :: ... I am boycotting this site b/c that punk Erica is like "I have stories to tell you! You have stories to tell me!" then as soon as she tells her story she is like "well i have to go in the shower" WHAT A PUNK!!!!!!! haha, j/k. I don't have any stories to ...

I am very worried right now. I can't really mention the details of why I'm so worried, but let's just say that someone's life is in my hands as we speak and it's really not the best night for me to be working alone. The next time we have a Myotonic Dystrophy run I REFUSE to work the overnight by myself. I'm flat out refusing, right now, and to anyone's face if they ask me to do it. Anyway in other news, I was thinking the other day that no matter how fucked up people think they are, there is always someone worse than them. This also happens to be true for people who think they're better than others at something. Now everyone knows this. But what I was thinking about is the degree to which people are bothered by it. Like if someone says that their life is so horrible and nobody could ever understand and blah blah, well unless you're The Elephant Man or Jeffrey Dahmer, chances are someone's got it worse off than you. Now does that statement make pe...

March 7th, 2004. Went to the hospital to see my grandpa, went out to dinner with Lauren and Joe, went back to Joe's house to watch Alias and The Practice, after The Practice went home. Found my mom crying in the kitchen saying my grandpa had passed away. It's been a year now. I started crying in the car on my way to work tonight. I guess I'm still not completely over it. Now I"m sitting in the lab talking online to Tim because he's the only one online and talking in real life to Pat (intern Pat not ex Pat) because he's here working with me and I'm all jittery from caffeine. I don't really have much to say but I think I should be writing in this because I haven't written in my blog in a little while. So ummm....yeah. God damn I can't think at all right now. I think I'll just post tomorrow night when I have a little more to say or I can think clearly and not in huge jumps of thought.

Sooooo tired. I've gotten out of the habit of working overnights and now I realize how annoying they can be. I don't know if other people do this, but when I get really tired but can't fall asleep for fear of losing my job, I start subconsciously thinking about my bed, laying in my bed, pulling the big soft comforter around me, and just drifting away. Mmmm that would be nice.....but then I snap out of it and look at the clock and see that I still have 4 more hours to work until that daydream will become a reality. Most of the people I work with sleep before they come in to work the 1 am to 9 am shift, but I don't do that. Maybe I should, but how the hell am I supposed to fall asleep at like 10 pm? It's not gonna happen. I don't go to bed before 12:30...EVER. So I guess I'll have to live with it. The lady that is sleeping in our lab tonight happens to be a journalist who has published articles in The New York Times ( http://www.nytimes.com/2004/12/05/magazine...